Job searching is like dating. Richard Nelson Bolles first revealed this concept to me in his book, What Color is Your Parachute?. The parallels are easy to see when you outline the similarities between finding a job & finding a mate.
Another message from Joe? An email from a potential employer? Oh, the joy!
Dating & Job Searching Similarities:
- Initial contact may be awkward.
- First face-to-face interaction geared toward “Will there be a next step?”
- The essential goal is to determine if this will be a short fling or a long-term relationship.
- Both parties ask “Do you have what I want? What I need? Are we a good fit?”
- Both parties have the power & opportunity to leave the relationship if they so desire (before establishing commitment).
- It should be fun, but is often nerve-wracking, frustrating & depressing.
- You find yourself waiting by the phone, anticipating a call from that special someone or something.
With this in mind, I’ve concluded that:
If I’m not a good fit for them (the organization, institution, business, etc.), they’re not a good fit for me.
Quite simply, if they don’t think I’m the best candidate for them, then they’re really not the best organization for me, either. Both of us deserve someone who will “fit” the culture & meet the needs of the relationship under consideration.
It’s rather like that certain someone who doesn’t call back. Obviously, they’re not a good fit if they’re unresponsive & uninterested in you.
Move on. Explore other opportunities & possibilities.
Inversely, if an organization or position doesn’t seem like quite the right fit for you, withdraw from the running & pursue other better-fitting opportunities.
You won’t find the perfect position or the perfect organization. Accept that. However, you should know who you are & all of your strengths, weaknesses, skills, talents & areas in which you excel.
When something doesn’t mesh with who you are & what you have to offer, move on. You should be excited about the opportunity, not filled with dread because it might come to fruition.
Really, that’s the crux of What Color is Your Parachute? – know yourself & you’ll find your best fit. It may take time & a lot of work, but you’ll be happier when you get there.
Honestly, I’m not “there” yet, but recognizing & acknowledging what I have to offer & need to learn has made the journey worth it.
Coming soon: honing concentration with Pilates and another mental frame for career-building!
